Lawyer Update

It is late and I am SO tired. We just got home, the kids are sleeping and I can't wait to head there myself. I do want to give an update on my conversation with the lawyer yesterday.

He was really nice. He was not a push over or a softy but he was not abrasive either. He was pretty no-nonsense. He asked me to explain my story and my history. I explained B and I and how we met, our relationship, what happened during our relationship, the kids and how things finally ended. I explained the history after we broke up, the constant phone calls and name calling and the eventual restraining order I filed against him. I explained our court history, how we ended up there the first and second and third and now the fourth.

All that was so easy. I have that down cold. I can talk about it without getting upset, without getting angry, without getting emotional. Then I had to talk about the kids and what was going on with them. I told him everything I could remember...dates, times, when the stories started, the kids' behavior changes. I told him everything that led up to the first denied visitation.

He listened patiently, asked questions when needed and told me...

I have not run out of options yet.

He said there were a few things that were working for me right now.
1. I have not allowed B to have unsupervised visitation since refusing to send them on overnights.
2. Our court order (from June) states that we are not allowed to file ANY parenting time assistance paperwork unless we have tried mediation first. The papers that B filed were parenting time assistance paperwork that asked for a contempt charge and extended overnights. He said the judge might just tell him to take a hike because he refused mediation (3 times at last count)
3. C's therapist is aware of what is going on and she is aware of the drastic changes in C and M's behavior. If she (or the psychiatrist she wants to send him to) will agree that visitation at this point could be emotionally damaging for C, there is nothing the courts can do about my refusal to send them

He said the best option at this point was to write a letter to B that basically says I don't feel that unsupervised or overnight visits are good for the kids right now. I should tell him that C has been writing letter to M (based on her recommendation) and the things he is writing are very disturbing...and list some examples. I should tell him that seeing M is the best option right now and due to her being on vacation (which she is and the reason why this is so hard to deal with right now) I understand that he will not get some of his court ordered parenting time. I should tell him that he is welcome to come here and see the kids but they are not to leave this house and I will be here the entire time. I should also tell him that per our court order, we are to attend mediation and ask him when he wants to start.

When I say "I should", that is depending on whether I hire him or not. I would need $1500 up front which I am not even close to having. So I need to figure that part out. But he is willing to take on my battle.

He said if I was to hire him, he wants any emails between B and I, any motions filed by Brent and any responses by me, all the letter C has written, his pictures, his "Angry" notebook (which is something we tried a while back), the summaries from our last mediation (that B) refused to go back to, the calendar I have been keeping (days he did not call, days he did call, the missed visits, the nasty messages, the nasty emails, the stories the kids were telling, etc).

So it sounds like I am not "up a creek" yet. I still have some options left and hopefully one of those will work. I obviously would like to have an attorney. B will have to deal with him and I will finally have some peace. B also does not believe I would hire an attorney so hopefully a strongly worded letter from an attorney would get him to back off a little.

So that's the update...